Still, I couldn't help but be jarred and a bit hurt when he confessed his many doubts to me a few hours ago.
I'm aware that my response was a bit too impassioned (as often it is when I am really feeling strongly about something) and I did come off sounding not entirely unlike a motivational speaker, but at least I can say I fought for it.
Nothing good comes without risk.
The people I value the most in life are people I worked hard to become so close with. The people I consider my closest friend, the people I can say "I love you" to and really feel the tightness in my chest and sincerity, they are people I've been through a lot with.
Now I'm not even going to throw around the 'l word' with this guy, but I'm just saying, we've known each other for months and have recently established that we both want to take things forward so I don't see the problem.
Where he sees the summer as a stressful time, a time of vacationing and separation, of sadness and longing, I refuse to see anything but possibility.
Maybe we will be in a relationship this summer.
Maybe we will get together and have ice cream on the boardwalk after a dip in the ocean.
Maybe we won't be together. he will go to Jamaica and grow as a person, I will go home and prepare for graduate school and do tons of yoga, growing as a person the whole time.
Whether we grow together or grow apart, we will both grow.That is my point.
I'm somewhat excited to see if anything blooms this weekend.